Sunday, February 19, 2012

Lily's Journey to a Stronger Heart - 13 (the Surgeon Said Yes!!!)





So here we go

Lily is going to have cardiac sugery.

Our cardiologist gave all of Lily's information to the cardiac surgeon at CHOP and he said he would recommend surgery, and soon.

He feels with the decrease in her pulmonary hypertension we have a window, and need to take advantage of that.  We don't have a date yet, probably early May.  They want to get out of winter, so to decrease the chance of her getting a cold.

The surgery she is getting is called a Glenn procedure, she will then need a second surgery, the Fontanne, about a year later.

There was a possibility they would do one big surgery, but because she still has hypertension and is considered high risk, it is safer to do two seperate surgeries.

Both surgeries will be open heart, and she will go on bypass.

So how are we feeling about this news???

Of coarse we are thrilled and excited, this is what we have been hoping and praying for, what the medication has been for, what the doctors had said would most likely never happen - so this news could not be more amazing.

 On the flip side, we are nervous, not fearful, just concerned for our precious girl. 

She is doing so amazing, so happy






What we know is that is it is a miracle that we are at this point, and we know that if God has opened this door, then we need to walk through it, trusting him all the way.



What we know is that is it is a miracle that we are at this point, and we know that if God has opened this door, then we need to walk through it, trusting him all the way.


the thought of jeopadizing that is unthinkable.

What we know is that it is a miracle that we are at this point, and we know that if God has opened this door, then we need to walk through it, trusting him all the way.

When we adopted Lily a year and a half a go, we expected to bring her home, and she would get the Glenn, and then the Fontanne, the pulmonary hypertension was not something we were expecting.  When we were told she would very likely never get surgery and maybe only live until her teens or less - we started a journey we had not anticipated when we accepted Lily's referral.

 Had we set out to adopt a child who may not live?   No Way.

Would we have originally excpted her referral if that was stated?  I honestly don't know. 

What we do know is that there was a point after we had accepted Lily's referral that it wouldn't have mattered what news we could have recieved, she was now ours no matter what.  When we recieved updated information on her saying she was delayed, couldn't sit, couldn't talk, we could have changed our minds, but for both Chris and I we knew it didn't matter.  She was our daughter, and there was nathing that was going to stop us from bringing her home. 

Does that mean it has all been eas?  No.

 There have been moments when we have said - man life would be easier if lily could talk, was out of diapers, and was well, but those are just brief moments.  Honestly we have been surprised by what we have found we can handle, and the alternative for her is unthinkable.

 Most of our momnets concerning Lily are filled with joy, love, amazement, and laughter, we feel so honored to have been chosen to be her parents and family.

This year and a half has stretched our family in many ways, we have seen the good, bad and the ugly about ourselves, but that's ok we have all grown, and are better for it. 

We could not imagine our lives without this precious girl








Sunday, January 29, 2012

Enjoying a gorgeous winters day in Williamsburg






Hold on to her Benjamin




Run quickly




She's fast





Now you can't get away






























Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Lily's journey to a stronger heart - 12 (cardiac cath) pt. 2

HER HYPERTENSON HAS COME DOWN

wow just seeing those words brings on tears

We went into Monday with peace. 

As we were sitting and waiting while Lily was in the cath lab, Chris asked me

"how was I feeling about the results?"

and my response surprised me a little, because I can honestly say I was not worried, concerned or stressed - I felt such a sence of peace, and even excitment and anticipation. 

and it wasn't that I knew that the results were going to be better, I just knew that either way I didn't need to be concerned.

This is different to how I was feeling a few months ago - I had allowed myself to be consumed and overwhelmed by the what ifs,  how long does she have, and how could I bare life without her. I don't know if it was the emotions of the holidays or what but at times it was not pretty (as some of my work buds can testify too).

As I began to get a grip, focus my eyes on my heavenly father, pray, and read the bible - those things that were consuming me, were replaced by peace.  It is not my burden to carry, no matter what Lily's future is it is OK, my job is to love her, enjoy her, not miss a moment because of fear.

How much better is it when we cast our cares on Him

I had actually gone from a place of  dreading the cath to excitement about it.

After the last time, we were prepared to hear anything - but you can imagine the joy we felt as the doctor told us the results.

Her pulmonary hypertension is significantly decreased - so what does this mean

well the doctors and surgeons and other very smart people will meet to discuss Lily's options over the next few weeks.

OPTIONS - wow we have options - last time we were being told, there was nathing else to be done!!!

They will discuss surgery - the question is when and what??

Thank you again for the continued love, prayer and support you all show to our family.

As far as Lily is concerned she is just HAPPY to be home.


Thursday, January 19, 2012

Lily's Journey to a Stronger Heart - 12 (cardiac cath)

We are getting ready to go CHOP for Lily's cardiac cath, which is on Jan 23rd.  We will leave here Sunday to drive up, and she will spend Monday night in the hospital for observation post cath.  We should return home Tuesday.


She is doing so well - growing, WALKING, happy, enjoying life



We were at Chop last Friday for a pre-cath visit, lots of tests - she was not happy!! The best part of the day was meeting another very special heart girl, Teresa, and her mom, Ann. You can read about Teresa here, on her momma's blog.  Teresa has severe cardiac defects and is in a similar situation to Lily in that she has pulmonary hypertension, and therefore has been unable to have the life saving surgery she needs.  We met a few weeks ago online when I was introduced to Ann's blog by my friend Jen, after a few emails back and forth we realized we were both going to be at CHOP on Jan 13th.  Teresa is an amazing little girl, full of life, so sweet and chatty - her mom is also pretty amazing, she has 9 children, 5 of which were adopted from China, all with medical needs - go check out her blog and read about the miracle they are seeing unfold in little Teresa's body.



We are going into Monday with anticipation.  We are anxious to know what is going on inside of Lily - from the outside she looks amazing - gaining weight, pink (except in the mornings when her hands and feet can look pretty blue), full of energy.  It's what's going on in her heart and lungs that we want to know - and more to the point has there been a change in her PULMONARY HYPERTENSION after a year on medication????




We have peace in our hearts - and whatever the news is, we know God is in control - as someone recently reminded me of - He loves Lily more than we do.




I will update from CHOP as soon as I can, thank you for all your continued love and prayers for Lily and us.

Here is a video of lily expolring CHOP last Friday - enjoy (it still amazes me to see her walking)

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Lily turns 4

On January 4th Lily turned four



She wanted nathing to do with the party hats



Nathing to do with the cake



She hated the balloons and was more interested in the gift bags than the gifts



but she loved birthday kisses from her sister



and fun fast rides from her brother








how blessed we are to have you in our life sweet girl - you are loved so much

Happy Birthday

Monday, December 12, 2011

Learning to say goodbye to the control freak

So tonight we planned to .....

 take the girls to see Santa (which Mia has been desperate to do)

look at some lights

 eat dinner out

well the reality of my life is things never go as planned


so instead ....

the line was Soooo long Santa was skipped

as we got a late start everyone was hungry and grumpy so the lights were skipped

 dinner did happen, but not where I had planned

 boys home to do homework

shopping for me at Walmart for Ben's school project and Ethan's play

 girls already in bed when I got home





as you can see someone else was a little upset about our change of plans and not seeing Santa


As a bit of a control freak, learning to go with the flow and be flexible and not get grumpy when the plans that I have meticulously created in my head do not happen is still something I am working on.

(I know you are all thinking - isn't she supposed to be the mom and a good example to her kids)

Although I have to say I managed to not throw any childish tantrums, or state more than once that tonight wasn't quite the Christmassie family night I had planned - which is actually progress when I recall some of my other (not so proud of) moments.

The reality is we were together. We smiled, laughed, argued a little, maybe even annoyed one another a little - but we were family, together, growing - so who cares if our night wasn't the "perfect greeting card" evening - I am totally satisfied, and loved my not so "perfect" Christmas night.

Disclaimer : this is huge for me - if Chris reads this he will be using it against me the next time things don't go to plan (which will probably be tomorrow)!!!!

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Happy Birthday to me

So I turned the BIG 40 - last September


I have wanted a DSLR for a very long time


 I have dreamt about them, drooled over pictures of them, and looked on enviously as friends take beautiful pictures of their children with them.

So it was decided by my hubby that I needed to spoil myself for my birthday and get a camera.

But they are not cheap (the reason I haven't bought one yet), and for those of you who know me, I like a bargain, I shop clearance, pick a restaurant by the coupon I have, and NEVER buy anything unless it is on sale.

 So it has taken me the last 2 months to finally do it - of coarse it took a sale, a bundle deal, and the ability to split payments over a few months, but I am SOOOOO excited !!!


So when the UPS man rang the doorbell today, I felt like my kids on Christmas morning






I have no idea what to do with it - my biggest hope is to get pictures of my kids, especially lily that aren't blurred, and aren't of the back of their heads











Oh and the beautiful camera strap is a birthday gift from my amazing friend Adeye - who had faith that I would take the plunge - that strap has been looking at me for the last 2 months saying - GO FOR IT :)!!!






Watch out kids - momma's got a new toy !!!