Fears

Our adoption agency sent a letter from our cardiologist today requesting our paperwork be expedited. Now just waiting to see what happens, things could move pretty fast.

Talking with the cardiologist again yesterday reminded me of how fragile and serious a state lily's health may be. There are so many unknowns. The only thing I do know is she is ours, and with God's strength we will be able to face whatever is in her and ours future.

I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say a little fear didn't creep into my heart when I spoke with the cardiologist yesterday, all the what ifs. When I shared this with Chris he reassured me that it doesn't matter about the what ifs. It doesn't matter if her future is to be long or short (but man do we pray for it to be long), what matters is she is the daughter God has given us she will no longer be an orphan, our family will be more complete, and we will love her with all we have. She has a destiny and no matter what it is we are now a part of it. Gosh do I love this man.

You see like with a lot of adoptions, I (the wife) first initiated the idea of adopting again. At first he was hesitant, life was good, Mia was amazing, what if this time it is harder. Once he knew this was what we were supposed to do(which didn't take long :) ) we discussed what we felt we could handle as far as a special needs adoption. He again was more unsure than me about what degree of physical need we could handle, which I totally respected it's a huge thing to take on, and both parents MUST be in full agreement. So we started the process, we received a couple of referrals of beautiful children with less serious physical needs, but didn't accept them (a heart wrenching experience) as we just knew they weren't ours. Then when Lily's referral came, with the seriousness of her condition, he barely blinked -I would even have to say he was for a split second more sure than me that she was OUR lily. He has remained certain through out this process he has been my rock, and I can not tell you how lucky I feel that I get to discover this journey of life with him beside me.

The road to adoption is not easy, it is full of many unknowns, but the rewards are immeasurable. The orphan crisis in the world is an epidemic, if you have questions about adoption, please ask me. If you know adoption is not for you, but want to help in some way, I can point you in the right direction.